The River

I sit on a rock, my sandy bare feet connecting me to the earth.  I watch as the sage green water tears through the canyon. I am overwhelmed with gratitude; for my sister for getting me on this trip, for my parents for making it all possible, but mainly just for being alive.  When I think about all the pain and heartache I have been through in my life, it all seems so minuscule now. 

It is easy to get caught up in the petty problems of our modern world.  Constantly worrying about your health, your love life, your career, whatever it may be.  But out here, in the bottom of this vast canyon, it is all so simple. This is life, and we are here to enjoy it.  

I feel gratitude for each breath I take and for each special moment I get to spend in this magnificent place.  The rapids rushing past my feet empower me with their untamed freedom. The crisp, fresh air wafting off the water fills my body with energy.  Out here, I am whole. In my day-to-day life I find myself looking for more, always searching for that new adventure or thrill, bored by the mundane chores of life.  But out here, at the bottom of this canyon, that feeling is no more. My every sense is satisfied with its utmost desire.  

It is not just my mind, though, that is content, but my body as well.  All of my pain seemed to wash away as I traveled further and further down the river.  The constant aches subsided and I was left feeling unstoppable. 

I suppose I should explain how I ended up at the bottom of the Grand Canyon.  Well, you see, one of my older sisters works for a river rafting company. She was booked on one of their trips but was unable to go so I was lucky enough to take her spot on a six day, hiking centered, motor boat trip! 

This was not my first time down the Colorado River.  Starting in seventh grade, I became a member of a group called Grand Canyon Youth.  By volunteering throughout the community all year, myself and other young teens were able to go on a river trip each summer! This experience changed my life forever.  We learned to be one with nature, to experience it to the fullest without damaging it. Leaving no trace that we were there, except our footprints. We tied up the boats, set up camp, cooked, washed dishes, and even cleaned the toilet together.  We slept under the stars, pondered life together and formed bonds that would last a lifetime.  

Ever since that first time I sat on the edge of a boat, dangling my feet in the water, I knew this was where I was meant to be.  I knew that this is how life was meant to feel. And now, over 10 years later, I am reunited with my old friend, the river. 

As the sun sets below the canyon walls, once again I am reassured by the universe that everything will be ok.  Even though I have this life altering disease I will still enjoy my life to the fullest and I will not let it hold me back.  If anything, I will use it to become stronger. And then use that strength to help others find their own.   

Life is too precious to focus on the negative aspects.  Instead of complaining about the bad, take time to appreciate the good.  Focus on your own goals and aspirations, not what you see on social media. Treat yourself with the kindness you deserve.  But above all, allow yourself to have fun, enjoy this earth we have been blessed to live on. Get out into nature. It is there, where I find inspiration, encouragement, and peace.